Petey's Journey To The Island Of Misfit Mascots

As you may have heard by now, new Purdue Pete didn't last so long in West Laffatthat.

Despite spending over a year engineering a mascot makeover that would no longer scare the shit out of young Boiler fans, Morgan Burke & Co. (d/b/a FailTrain, Inc.,) kept their hot hand going (read: continued fucking up miserably at their jobs) and unveiled the new Purdue Pete at their spring game.

Needless to say, he was fired after one day on the job......on his day off.

The Hoosier Chronicles has obtained exclusive images showing the moments New Petey made his fatal misstep and later arriving in his new home.

Like most Purdue guys, women took to new Pete like vagina repellent.

Pete's arrival on the Island of Misfit Mascots.

Indiana Mr. Basketball & IU

With today's announcement, Cody Zeller becomes the 26th Indiana Mr. Basketball winner to play for the Hoosiers.

Some Indiana Mr. Basketball facts:
  • IU has had 30% more Indiana Mr. Basketball winners (26) than all other in-state schools combined (20): Purdue-10, Notre Dame- 2, Butler- 2, Evansville-2, Anderson-1, Ball State-1, Indiana Central- 1, Valparaiso- 1.
  • In the 72 years since the honor was first awarded, only 10 IU rosters have lacked an Indiana Mr. Basketball winner.
  • When Cody joins Jordy Hulls in Bloomington this fall, they will represent the 13th time multiple Indiana Mr. Basketball winners have teamed up at IU: Hulls/Zeller, Gordon/Ratliff, Coverdale/Jeffries, Bailey/Graham, Graham/Jones, Edwards/Jones, Alford/Brooks, Bouchie/Tolbert, McGinnis/Shepherd, Van Arsdale/Van Arsdale, Rayl/Van Arsdale/Van Arsdale, Garrett/Masters, Garrett/Masters/Schwartz.

FAIL Has A New Face

After years of terrorizing children with his hard plastic face, rapist's grin, and lustful gaze, Purdue University decided it was time to give their beloved mascot, Purdue Pete, a make-over.

And despite the University's usual bumblefucking inadvertent leaking of new Pete's image earlier in the week, thousands hundreds dozens of Boiler fans showed up at Ross-Ade Stadium today to witness the ceremonial passing of the hammer to the newest conductor of the Fail Train. (Apparently, however, Petey's hammer isn't making the transition. Cue fucktarded facebook group.)

In honor of Pete's continued metamorphosis, let's look back at the many faces of failure: